and it has become my favorite activity lately: reading my old diaries! it kills boredom, really hehehe. those diaries was from my 3rd year of elementary school until my first days being 6th grader. and my favorite diary is this one! it's clear that i admire disney princess so damn much even until now. i still remember i bought this one from Gramedia matraman when i was a 4th grader. looks like this was the only diary my parents ever bought me--i usually bought diaries on my own--hence it was kinda expensive. actually this diary comes with a box and a set of padlock and the key but unfortunately i couldn't find them..
i tell you: it's really fun reading your old diary! not only fun, it's interesting. it's fun when your old memories--that might have been forgotten--pops up on your brain as you read your old diary. now i can clearly remember how good my "good old days" on elementary school was, lol.
i also can remember how charming my childhood crush was.. ahahhaa. i can remember my favorite TV show as a child. i'm amazed by the truth that i used to had a huge crush for my childhood idol: cakka from idola cilik 2 LOL! it was like, huge. and also i just realized that i used to hate "karet" thingies. i was like, the only girl that didn't have ability to play "karet", so i simply hate it because i couldn't join my friends, and my friends also didn't allow me to join them LOL.
i used to hate my maid so much that time, that i called her "iblis". i already think about money so much that i made lots calculation of my "uang saku" on my diary. i understood my mom when she had no money so i won't ask anything for a while. i understood a lot about hand phone thingies even when i had no hand phone yet. i used to really, really want to be able to speak Japanese, English and French. i was really dumb in English--i didn't know anything about grammar and i mistranslated lots of vocabs--but my friends still thought that i was an expert. i already tried to learn Japanese. i wanted to become a teenager so bad. i secretly read my sister's magazine ("gadis" and "kawanku") and really worried that someday people would know. i secretly read my sister's diaries (lol). i'm amazed by those facts. i'm amazed with the fetus version of my self... it's like, i was way too smart for an elementary school student LOL.
way too smart, but also way too sassy and selfish. really! i was also too racist! i was somehow really love my identity being a Javanese and i hate some other ethnic lolololol. i think that's because of my dad. i used to talk a LOT with my dad when i was in elementary school, and my dad's kinda racist yet he denied it. i also used to hate almost every one from my class lol. i used to think that i was the best, every one's fool ahahhaa. i used to love my self so much.
sangat, sangat interesting gimana gue bisa ngeliat dunia dengan point of view anak kecil lagi. ga nyangka juga ternyata dulu gue mikirnya kaya gitu. ternyata, gue bener-bener mikirin soal mainan b a n g e t. walaupun dulu gue pikir gue dan temen-temen gue udah cukup dewasa pemikirannya, ternyata ngga sama sekali LOL. gue bener-bener mikirin mau nabung berapa hari dan mau beli mainan apa. terus worried karena belum beli majalah princess edisi terbaru. alig, masalah gue cuma sebatas belum beli princess terbaru wkwkwkw. oh iya satu lagi, gue ngga menang lomba membuat kartu valentine di majalah princess (* >ω<)
i also shocked by the fact that i write about boys s o m u c h. like, 60%-70% of my diary is about my crush. not only my crush tho, i also write about my friend's crushes. and my friend's boyfriends. yes, they already had boyfriends that time. :( they even told me "lo belum ngerasain pacaran sih, ran," when we were in 4th grade:(. i even had a plan that i would give a chocolate to my crush on valentine's day. Thank God the plan wasn't accomplished.
here's my favorite quotes from my childhood diaries:
★ "aku benci semua, kecuali Phummy." (Phummy [poo-mee] was the name of my cat that time)
★ "masa, Symbian 7.0 tuh S80! tapi S80 kan, nggak bisa buat download game! Kan yang bisa cuman S40 dan S60!" (dahell what iz symbian, s80, s40 and s60-_-)
★"eh, aku pengen belajar nulis baik, cantik, dan.. ah, masa lalu yang kelam!" :(
★"eh, aku dapat tips membedakan penyihir sama wanita biasa loh.. iya, penyihir sungguhan memang selalu wanita."
reading the last sentence makes me stupefied for a moment... ya ampun, enak banget ya jadi anak kecil. ga nyangka ternyata gue bener-bener mikir kaya gitu dulu. gue bener-bener mikir such things as 'penyihir' itu ada, bahkan ngapalin tips membedakan penyihir beneran dan wanita biasa... :')
some people may wanted to write diary, but they only write in the first three days. gratefully i'm not that type of person. i love writing diaries up until now. i still write my diary and i call it "the high school journal", lol. Btw pls note that i'm no longer using "dear, diary" to start my writing. it may sounds cheesy right, writing diary on daily basis? but yeah, i love writing diary, and re-reading them. 'writing diary' isn't that bad and cheesy. it actually helps you increase your writing ability.
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| digital diary? lol. it has 310 pages now |
and then i realized, up until now, the main topic of my diary, my elementary school and high school diary is still the same: crushes. LOL. and i always have nick name for those crushes, like the funny boy or TFB when i was 3rd grader (pls pardon the nickname, it was the only nick name a 3rd grader girl with messy grammar could think of)
walaupun masih terus nulis diary, dan mungkin main topicnya masih sama, tapi sekarang mah apa atuh, selalu mikir orang lain lebih baik. selalu ngerendahin diri sendiri. kerasa sih sekarang emang udah lebih dewasa, ga gampang gasuka sama orang. jadi makin ngerti repotnya dan ribetnya hubungan antar manusia, jadi lebih toleransi, ngertiin dan ngehargain orang lain. kalo dulu kan bebas mau gasuka sama orang, mau ngatain orang blablabla lol. btw, jadi berasa tua. :(
あなたもね、日記を書くはじめよう！ヽ(=^･ω･^=)丿
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